The other day as I was walking through a store, grocery shopping, I heard a loud voice in my ear telling me to quit this blog. It kept saying that it was useless to even start. Don’t bother, the voice was saying. Give it up already. Who do you think you are to be writing about Christian things? You’re not a theologian. You are just a woman, what can you possibly offer anyone? Just quit already. This is going to be a huge waste of time. Quit, quit, quit, the voice wouldn’t stop. I felt anxious and overwhelmed. I felt discouraged. I made a quick decision in my head that I would quit before I even started. I prayed a desperate prayer, telling God I would quit, but if You change your mind, I won’t.
It’s an interesting journey, this Christian walk. We do hear voices in our head. Not that we are crazy, on the contrary. I believe God grants much sanity as a believer in Jesus Christ. However, we do hear voices in our head. But that would be expected. When we accept Jesus Christ as Savior, the Holy Spirit moves in. He moves inside of us. And He starts talking. I love that whole imagery of the Holy Spirit talking to us. He makes suggestions. He tells us what to do. He warns us. He guides us. He pricks our conscience. The Holy Spirit is ONE of the voices we hear.
And then there are other voices. These aren’t nice voices. They’re the voice of the enemy talking. The enemy is out to destroy us, discourage us, shut us down anyway possible. As we walk the Christian walk, we come in contact with the enemy. He wants to deceive us. He wants to throw us off our game. To use a football analogy, he wants to tackle us and even hurt us so bad, we can’t play in the game anymore. Every believer has had the enemy’s voice in their head, some have listened to it, and some recognize it as the enemy talking.
How do we recognize who is doing the talking? Good question. If the enemy wants to discourage us, then when we feel discouragement, that’s the enemy. If we feel anxious, overwhelmed, that is the enemy. The enemy’s goal is to hurt us, and if we feel feelings of doubt, and discouragement, you know the enemy is attacking you. And obviously, God is the opposite. He loves us. He cares for us. He asks us to cast our cares upon Him for He cares for us. God encourages us. He answers our prayers. God is our hope and salvation. Experiencing hope and encouragement is from the Lord.
Obviously, I haven’t quit before I started. I’m still here. After I prayed my desperate prayer, a funny thing happened on my way to quitting. I came home from the store and sat down at the computer. I was prepared to give it one more shot. There were a couple of things I didn’t know how to do and it was frustrating me. I decided to look up a newsletter about blogging, called the Useletter by Amy Lynn Andrews, to see if I could get some help. I pulled up the Useletter and I had a screenful of columns of newsletters to choose from. I randomly picked one of the newsletters and clicked on it. Wham! Of all the newsletters in all of that site I picked the one that was addressing my EXACT problem I was facing! I did exactly what she said. It worked! Hot dog, I was in business again! Just to make sure this wasn’t a fluke, I did it again, and it worked perfectly. Of all of the newsletters on that screen I just so happened to pick the exact one I needed. Now was this a coincidence? I think not! God was at work here. My first problem was solved.
My second problem was pictures. I wanted to attach a nice picture of God’s creation for my first blog. The so called free websites I was going to for pictures weren’t free. As I was fumbling with a picture I randomly clicked on a picture we already had taken a few years ago. It was so nice, I decided to use that one. I put it in my blog and it worked! I didn’t have to pay big bucks for it. I felt so hopeful and encouraged. I might just be able to do this whole blogging thing after all. There were these feelings bubbling up in me: hope, encouragement, joy…I was smiling by this time. Gone were those ugly feelings I had felt at the store. Gone was the discouragement. Gone was the feeling of wanting to quit.
The enemy only shows up when we are doing something that might harm his career of taking as many people to hell with him as he can. I must be doing something right, if the enemy was attacking me and telling me NOT to do the blog. That voice in the store, that was discouraging me, was the enemy. The guidance I felt as I worked on my blog, was the Lord.
It hit me smack in the face. If God was encouraging me and the enemy was discouraging me, I need to go with God. God wants me to do the blog. The enemy doesn’t. Hmmm, which should I choose? I think that’s obvious. So now I’ve done a 180 degree turn around. I feel hopeful about the blog. And if the enemy doesn’t want me to do it, I really probably should.
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