Winter Has Come

My winter has come. I’ve been dreading this time, for a long time. But it is here, whether I like it or not. Like the changing seasons, I’ve moved into this new one. My winter.

Like the cold, barren land, that winter creates, I feel like my life is like that. My kids are grown and don’t need me like they did when they were little. I’m not homeschooling anymore. I’m looking for a job to help pay for my son’s college, with absolutely no luck. That’s what I have been waiting for. At times, I question whether it was the right thing to do, to homeschool my kids. I’ve been out of the work force for so long, was it worth it?

As my negative thoughts overtake me, God reaches down and gives me gifts, to console me.

My son is doing well in his school work. He tells me it’s because I homeschooled him. Right when I think I’ve wasted my time.

My kids went out the other night, together. I stood by the kitchen sink, watching them go and feeling my heart soar. They both are so different and have completely different lives, but they went out together to go get some food. I felt a dampness on my cheeks as I watched them go.

My son complimented my daughter, the next day. He told me what a great conversationist she was and how he enjoyed being with her. A lump formed in my throat.

I have friends who are going through some of the same things. We get together and pray for one another. These friends are like a crackling fireplace on a cold winter night – they warm me.

The other day I stood in a long line at a check out counter. I noticed a lady at the end of the counter I was at. She was looking desperately around, pacing back and forth. I couldn’t help but notice her. When I did look at her, she was wearing a t-shirt with the name of a place I had recently applied to. It was like God letting me know, I’m here, I’ve heard your prayers. I haven’t forgotten you.

That’s how God works. In every season of our lives, He is there. He doesn’t leave when winter comes. He gives us the things we need to survive winter. He gives us a warm coat, a fireplace, a bird lighting on an icy tree branch. God is comprehensive. He doesn’t just supply us with food, shelter and clothing. He goes much deeper than that. He knows our every thought, and he takes away our discouragement. He wipes away our tears. He lets us rest our head upon His bosom, while He rubs our head. God’s love isn’t minimal, just the basics. It’s vast and far reaching. He tends to us, so that every single need is met. He even supplies us with parking spots.

So in this winter season I am grateful. I am grateful to God. I am grateful for his overwhelming kindness to me. I am grateful for His comprehensive love for me. If you are a one of God’s children, rest in the knowledge that He loves you completely.